Update on today and worries

After my entry earlier, we went out. Turns out pawn shops in Alabama are closed on Sundays. So we went home and I started thinking of things to do. (The D4 was giving me a lot of energy.) So we decided to go out to the shooting range and then to the store to find some glow in the dark stars for the walls and ceiling in our room. After I got ready, I went upstairs to take my blood pressure. (I've been having weird issues so I'm trying to keep an eye on it) Well Zach was up there getting the guns ready. When I was done I started going downstairs. I had socks on and I lost my balance. My feet came out from under me and I slid down 5 or so stairs. I grabbed the railings to stop myself. I twisted one finger and hit my elbow on something. Now I've got a bruise going on my elbow and one starting on my hip. Well we went out shooting, (pistols) and I did better than him. :-) yay. He does better with rifles. (I hate rifles) Well when we were done we tried to find the glow in the dark stars but didn't. Though I did find a bubble wand thingy that's been keeping me entertained. I tried studying for my psych test tomorrow, but I can't seem to focus. I'll study before class tomorrow. I'll also write my speech outline for class Tuesday. I uploaded some pictures from Disney on my facebook. I'm trying to upload some to deviantart but, again, I cant focus on something for too long.

I'm kind of nervous about Tuesday. I've got my initial appointment with a counselor at the Calhoun Cleburn Mental Health Center. I don't know the address so I have to call them tomorrow and ask. I don't know why I'm so nervous. I just don't know what to expect. I'm afraid of being told that I'm crazy and I'm not going to get better. I'm afraid of being told there's nothing wrong and I just need to get over myself. I'm afraid that I won't get along with the person and thus I won't be able to talk about intimate things that are bothering me. And somewhere deep down inside of me, I'm afraid to get help and get better. My problems have seemed to define me. I find who I am in them. I don't know. I'm just nervous. I know I need the help and I know it's good. I just don't know how it's going to go.